“Say what you believe in a manner that bespeaks the determination with which you believe it.” ~Taylor Mali

It’s sometimes, like, really difficult to, um, complete even one sentence without, like, using one of these three phrases, you know?  Imagine all Internet content written in this style. You would douse your computer with gasoline and set it aflame after the first two paragraphs.

You don’t write this way, but perhaps you speak this way. Not to worry, everyone is gu...

Continue reading ...

RefinED Friends,

Several days ago, I sat in an elementary school office waiting for a meeting.  It was bus arrival, so the office hummed with teacher, parent, and student activity, all facilitated by a lone, kind administrative assistant. At one point, nearing the morning bell, two girls, likely fourth or fifth grade, came into the office looking very concerned.

"What can I do for you girls?" the administrative assistant asked.

"We have a problem on the bus," the girls replied.

"What's the proble...
Continue reading ...

RefinED Friends,

Within the past few weeks, even more information has emerged regarding the tragic death of Michael Deng at Baruch College in New York.  This nineteen-year-old young man died at the hands of his future “brothers” after being subjected to excessive physical abuse.  The case has been ruled a homicide, and it is likely the young men involved will feel the legal, emotional, and public consequences for years to come.

Incidents like these clearly match the hazing ...

Continue reading ...

RefinED Friends,

They burst through the glass doors before I had taken five steps from my car.  Flanked on both sides by hugs, I walked inside with them and was met with dumbfounded looks by Starbucks patrons.  Had a celebrity entered just now? By the smiles and excitement of my two former students, with whom I was visiting this Sunday, you might have thought so. One student's mother, accompanying the two, had already secured a table and treated me to a beverage.  The girls had a handmade card...
Continue reading ...

RefinED Friends,

I spent this past weekend in New Orleans for a fraternity Board of Directors meeting.  During that time, we welcomed Dave Westol, founder of Limberlost Consulting, Inc., former Executive VP for Theta Chi Fraternity, and one damn fine dedicated Greek battling the hazing epidemic.  Among his many useful remarks, this resonated beyond others, "You can't be my friend and haze me."

The definition of 'friend' explicitly states 'an interpersonal bond beyond simple association.'  Those...
Continue reading ...

RefinED Friends,

In 1852, Cardinal John Henry Newman delivered a series of lectures entitled "The Idea of a University", emphasizing how University environments are designed to mold student minds, not simply dispense knowledge.  Within his lectures, he spent time discussing his definition of a gentleman.  As I reread this portion today, a phrase struck me:

He (the gentleman) has his eyes on all his company; he is tender towards the bashful, gentle towards the distant, and merciful towards the a...

Continue reading ...

RefinED Friends,

I remember finding it stuffed in a cabinet among some rarely used curricular materials when I moved into the classroom during my first year of teaching fifth grade.  A simple, cardboard box marked with the word "Questions?" in bold, black print. Turns out, this box was meant for collecting those delicate questions that often pop into fifth grade brains when participating in the annual human growth and development talk.  It got me thinking--if we're inviting questions about a s...
Continue reading ...

Friends:

A popular Greek myth is that of Theseus and the Minotaur.  As the story goes, King Minos of Crete, after an attack on Athens, was asked by the Athenian king for a truce.  In return for peace in Athens, every nine years the Athenian king would send seven Athenian boys and seven Athenian girls to Crete as food for The Minotaur in its labyrinth.

Now before you click the "New Tab" button on your browser, wondering all the while why RefinED Character chose its first blog post to feature chi...
Continue reading ...